Pixellated Projects

Early childhood stains across the mirrors. As old, tired eyes glance through the sorrowful timeline. Each event is a crack representing shameful regret. As there is no going back. They thought they had time.  

The sight of kids tramping through the mellow fields while living joyous pleasures. As warmth is brought to many hearts. Parents behold the sight, pleased and feeling fulfilled to the brim, The old, tired eyes watch themselves hiding out behind a tree, detached from the moment as if in a different reality. They thought they had time.  

Club and Volunteering events come into play. As kids immersed in them and made heartfelt friends and connections. Social skills blossomed and identities were born, amass many. The old, tired eyes watched as they gave everything the cold shoulder. Uninterested and indifferent, they thought they had time.  

Parties became pivotal as kids brought early significant others and exchanged invitations. Through trends and giggles, stages and music were the foreseen future. As kids held the letters dear to their hearts in excitement. The old, tired eyes watched themselves throw theirs in a trashcan. To them, the realm of books and video games was more enticing. They thought they had time. 

As internships and opportunities swarmed the college schools, people took advantage with more connections and knowledge to show for it. The old, tired eyes watched themselves reject them, thinking they were all distractions. As a result, all things such as field trips faded, but alas, they continued on. They thought they had time.  

As the old, tired eyes watched themself apply to a new beginning with their certified paper. They faced rejection as a near blank resume screamed unworthy. Borderline near the form of a silent judge. Nothing but a shrug as they apply to a full-time job. The old, tired eyes is beyond ashamed. They thought they had time. 

As the days go by, like fading wind. The old, tired eyes watch themself slave away, bound and tied to meaningless work life chains, Reprieve was only fulfilled through the comforting acts of solace. Given through useless internet usage and brainless games. Not only was the body rotting away, but the brain was also destined to suffer the same mutualistic fate. They thought they had time. 

The old, tired eyes watched in silence as they witness the day where they collapse on the job, battered and bruised. The toll of carrying heavy masses has finally reach the grand inevitable finale. The blazing sirens scream through the air, as the bed becomes their new mainstay. The x-ray is the grim reaper as they spell the bad news. The old, tired eyes watch as they are forced to relinquish their job. Their expression on the face says it all as it transcended the depths of shock. They thought they had time. 

As the old, tired eyes watch themself recover and eventually leave the hospital. They realize they are lost in the fog. All options for them are nearly too late, and the energy for these things is now long gone with age and no longer good health. They watch themselves trek back to their apartment. Accepting as they boot their systems and put everything back in the rearview mirror. They still thought they had time. 

Eventually, the purchase of canes and stair lifters are now in the picture. As the old, tired eyes watch themselves slowly move through the apartment. Unsatisfied, unfulfilled, bitter, resentful, miserable, all moods of bad fortunes. They look out their window, gazing at the outside life that seems so foreign to them. They slowly walk outside, just grasping and taking in the grass, the trees, the natural elements for what it is and appreciating the scent and the peace it brings. Their eyes grow watery as they grow sadly reminiscent. They thought they had time.  

The old, tired eyes finally finish scouring their timeline as they reach the end. Back to their current reality, completely bedridden and near the end of their existence.  They sigh now, not because they thought they had time. But because time truly had them.